Las Vegas Awaits

Raidermobile

Yes, believe it or not, there was a time I actually drove this car around town!! Obviously, years ago in a galaxy far away as the Pacific Bell reference makes clear – it was long ago. Not many people can say they were a big enough fan to do this on a daily basis. Gives new meaning to the phrase I bleed Silver and Black, or at one time I did.

 

 

Raider Nation – Brand Identity Part 2

Early on I scored several major coups by enlisting the aid of various Raiderettes to the cause of Raider Nation. This drove the competition bonkers as they were driven insane by the very real speed by which Raider Nation was becoming the acknowledged leader for Raider fans on the Internet, and beyond. First they lost the coveted Raider Locker Room outlet by which the image and name of Raider Nation could be advertised daily through a brick and mortar outlet. Then they lost the battle for the very hearts of Raider fans when the Raider Nation moniker started to appear on the backs of cheerleaders – WTF, this is adding insult to injury. It was a brilliant execution of strategy aimed at making the Raider Nation brand well known and adopted as a symbol of Raider fans worldwide.

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Old King Cole was a merry old soul and a merry old soul was he……..

Senior manager at one firm would glide across the room and greet visitors as if she had known them all her life. Speaking platitudes of how glad they were to see the visitor and going over the top in expressions of love and happiness. Of course this belied the underlying contempt this person had for everyone and that all the happy, happy, joy, joy was just a facade she used to get what she wanted. Boy, but turn her down once she made this grand spectacle of opening her heart to you, regardless of how asinine whatever she was asking for, and you would see the immediate dark side.

She was the type of manager that had no regard for the true opinions of those who worked for her. What?, you thought my expressions of peace, love, and happiness were real – then you are the real idiot in the room. All her expressions of love and caring were only intended to placate the emotional need of those she dealt with. If you did not know her then you accepted these offerings as genuine. Having dealt with this person day in and day out over a period of years I knew them for what they were – nothing but word vomit, diarrhea of the mouth, mutterings of a serial con artist, etc…

You might ask, why do so many managers in the workplace operate in such a manner? The simple answer is, unfortunately, that it works the majority of the time. A manager such as this lacks substance but gets by on the happy, happy, joy, joy facade which allows them to build political brownie points. Of course, ignore the fact that these types are generally not the sharpest knives in the drawer, but that is exactly the point – they have become shrewd manipulators who divert your attention away from the fact they can’t walk and chew gum at the same time.

They are the Joker in the deck. Great to have around company parties and events as they have learned the art of saying a lot without really saying anything. Meaningless dribble which buys many many political points and kudos in organizations that put more value on “fitting into the culture” versus actually accomplishing something.

I actually believe in a much more direct and honest approach to communication. One in which there is nothing left to the imagination. If you don’t like something, say so – I know this is a novel concept in an age where one must at all times mute what might be harmful to the social environment and the delicate souls that operate in it.

Lesson learned: happy happy joy joy is no substitute for proven experience and the ability to execute.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

About 5150 Business Strategy / Raider Nation

via About 5150 Business Strategy / Raider Nation

 

In the Pursuit of Happiness

You Can’t Fix Stupid

Another viewpoint

So called management at one firm thought they had the upper hand in a game of should we pay him for the stock he owns or not. For months they labored under the misguided notion that withholding my stock payout somehow gave them power to shape events related to another business entity that I was managing partner. Two other members of this LLC had given their desire to exit due to their loss of confidence in those remaining at the operating company. The brain trust, and I use brain loosely, thought they had control of all the variables needed to force a resolution in which they could payout one third of the value to the exiting members. A low ball offer that they justified under what they called “minority interest”. Funny, thought we were all in this LLC with equal shares – unfortunately for them that was well documented, there were no minority interests in this LLC. Learn to read numbnuts.

The sound of “I am the boss” echoed through the halls as one senior manager jumped up and down in a tantrum. What I say goes and I say we don’t payout stock like we did for everyone else. Of course, then they made an offer to buyout my stock not using the standard formula adopted for past shareholders and, of course, it was for a lower amount. Wait a minute Sparky, here it is clearly documented what the formula is and how it is to be applied. The reply after consulting with their counsel was worded in legalese – “we are not bound to calculate share value with the formula you provided but we will in this one instance”. LOL, checkmate. Sign this agreement before we do the calculation and we will pay you out. Ha, Ha, Ha – nice try you dimwits, I don’t think so – you do the calculation and establish the price and then I will sign. Checkmate. Then things go on hold as they regroup and try to figure out other ways to screw me over. This takes several months as they are extremely dim witted and it takes a long time for them to come up with these lame brain schemes.

Right about now one of the brain trust looks at the balance sheet and sees the shareholder loan which has been on the books for the last five years. I can see the senior manager now running down the hall in glee declaring victory but then realizing that the loan is for more than the stock value they owe me, LOL. Glee turns to sadness as they realize they have been outmanuevered once again. Checkmate. The senior pigs gather round to devise a new strategy. Although just about every one of them has a shareholder loan they of the weak minded arrive at this – the shareholder loan he has is unauthorized and this is embezzlement. Really!! It took you five years to figure this out, LOL. If I was an embezzler this company would be a target rich environment – they were clueless. First, let me record my entries on the balance sheet for all to see and then distribute these statements to all partners every month. What a most excellent strategy not to be discovered, LOL. Like I have said numerous times – these guys are not the sharpest knives in the drawer, one short of a six pack, toys in the attic, etc…. You get the idea, I am dealing with those of limited IQ.

Lesson learned: You can’t fix stupid. There’s not a pill you can take or a class you can go to.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Hear that Flush….

Sound of a million dollars going down the drain……

Management at one firm was so detached from reality that they could not wrap their brain around why anyone would get upset about getting a million dollar plus free to the bottomline boost and have it disappear due to poor management. More frustrating was their continued refusal to acknowledge that losses had piled up due to poor project management and poor estimating.

“We paid for these items in prior periods so this settlement means nothing”, WHAT? I would expect that type of an answer from a three year old, not the senior manager and leader of a firm. Duh, really – you think because items were expensed in prior periods that recovering that money in a current period means nothing?? Mental midget time. The entire justification for why losing a million dollars was OK was this logic? Surely there must be more to it I thought. Waiting for the stars to align would be more fruitful than getting a logical answer from senior management. One cannot speak intelligently when the mental capacity to do so is lacking and where the entire justification boils down to, “because I can”. At this point one should resign themselves to the situation being unsalvageable. It is DUHHHH time.

Of course senior management at this firm came up with elaborate excuses for why it was not their fault for these losses. Thank God we caught the finance guys before they took the entire firm down the toilet, LOL. Idiotic on the very face of it given that the finance and accounting department had nothing to do with projects that racked up million dollar losses. Plays well, however, to those not in tune with the inner workings of the company and the fact that management had been warned multiple times about the need to clean up their estimating and project management.

Years of warnings went unheeded while all along the project losses piled up one after another. Poor estimating and poor strategy on where the firm should be heading all contributed to the quagmire the firm found itself in.

Jane, Moe. Larry and Curly strike again…………

Lesson learned: shares in a company that cannot form a cohesive strategy and remedy their shortcomings are worthless. Fifty-one percent of zero = zero. By extension, you could conclude that the majority shareholders of firms such as this are worthless, both managerially and monetarily.

 

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Raider Nation – The Foundations

Traditional print media was covered with Silver and Black Illustrated.

Raidermobile

Yes, believe it or not, there was a time I actually drove this car around town!! Obviously, years ago in a galaxy far away as the Pacific Bell reference makes clear – it was long ago. Not many people can say they were a big enough fan to do this on a daily basis. Gives new meaning to the phrase I bleed Silver and Black, or at one time I did.